There is so much on my heart and mind tonight. It has been such a complex and full week. So first things first: the joy. On Monday, I’d planned to swing by a coffee shop just to pick something up from a friend. I ended up staying an hour and a half, hanging out with two of my favorite people on the planet – and it was such a gift, that time. We haven’t had that kind of time, just the three of us, in months. And there’s something so incredibly awesome about just being with people who love you, talking and laughing and simply being together – no agenda, no expectations. Just time spent. (Why, yes – quality time is my primary love language. How did you know?)
Second: another great article on one of my favorite topics: can guys and girls really just be friends? There is so much great insight in that article. Regardless of what your own answer to that question might be, I’d encourage you to follow the link and consider what John Wesley Reid has to say. I think there’s more to be said – and I’m going to say some of it in next month’s series on singleness and the church – but in the meantime, I think Reid’s post has some valid insight and poses good food for thought.
Speaking of next month’s series – I can’t even begin to tell you how excited I am, both about some of the guest posts that will be featured and about sharing with you some insights I’ve gleaned from interviews with single men and women who come from a variety of perspectives. If you’re single (or if you know someone who is) – I would encourage you to like Simple Felicity on Facebook, follow me on Twitter or add Simple Felicity to your feed reader (and recommend it to your friends!) – so you can be sure to catch new posts as they come along. And if you’re married – please don’t tune out. I really think there will be some good things in this series for you, too. Please drop in and join the conversation!
January’s syncroblog had some incredible posts – but this one, by far, was my favorite: it’s called “bursting” – and it’s about grieving, falling apart, being authentic and real in your pain, and waiting. all i could say in response to it was “…wow…” And that really does about sum it up.
photo courtesy of ©Depositphotos.com / markin
A good friend of mine posted this article to Facebook this week, about the art of presence. Can i just tell you how true these insights are? There are, most definitely, things to say and things NOT to say to someone who is grieving. We’re all going to go through something tough, or will know someone going through something tough. This article is a must-read, and truly helpful towards understanding how to be helpful to our friends who are grieving.
On a somewhat related note… my grandfather died this morning. 🙁
I found out this afternoon, and I am so incredibly grateful for the friends who have stepped up and said, “Let us know if there’s anything we can do.” But I’ll admit: when someone says that, I rarely know how to respond.
Knowing they’re willing to be there for me means so much. But I’m still in shock. I’m grieving. And I don’t know how to say, “Could I just come over, and completely interrupt your life?”
Which is why I appreciated this text from a friend yesterday. She said, “If there is anything else I can do for you, hugs, a good book recommendation to keep your brain occupied, a yummy home cooked meal, a comfy couch to hang out on…just let me know.” Another friend texted to say, “I’m free tomorrow if you just want to hang out.”
I still don’t know how to say, “Sure, bring me dinner, that would be awesome!” because I’m grieving, but I can still cook… But I so deeply appreciated the specificity of those offers. “Here are the things I can do that might help; please pick one.”
Having options to choose from is more helpful than you might think. There’s no formula for grief. We all grieve in our own ways and at our own pace. I’m not always going to know what would be most helpful in a given moment. But most of my friends know me well enough to guess – and make suggestions. I so appreciate that.
And on a completely different note: this video kind of made my day. Enjoy!
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