7 Quick Takes Friday (vol. 25): on writing, reading, and relating well

— 1 —

my friend Sara asked me this morning about take-aways from the experience of writing this series on singleness and the church.  it’s been an unexpected journey.

• i’ve made new friends and gained new readers (thanks so much for swinging by – i’m really honored that you did.)
• i’ve written with a greater degree of vulnerability than i’d intended on more than one occasion, which has been really good for me, tho incredibly difficult.
• i’ve realized that this was a bigger project than i realized when i started and that far too many voices aren’t going to make into this conversation before its planned end date, and i’m sorry for that.  (tho i guess the nice thing about having my own space is that i can kick back into this series later if i want to!)
• i’ve re-discovered how incredibly life-giving writing is for me; and am now living in the tension between wanting to give it more time and simply not having it.
• and best of all – i’ve gotten small glimpses into how God has been using this time and effort.  the emails, texts and conversations i’ve had with people about the ways in which this series has been making them think and even brought about reconciliation and restoration and better friendships in their lives has been so rewarding.

all that said – i’m going to finish out this series because i said i would and because there’s more to say – but i’m also really looking forward to wrapping it up and writing about other things in March.  🙂  writing about singleness every day is making me a lot more aware of it as a major dimension of my life than i usually am, and i’m ready for that to no longer be the case.

— 2 —

so logically my diversion of the week has been reading romance novels… yeah, i don’t really understand that either, but it’s a paradox i’m okay with.  i’m reading Lisa Tawn Bergren’s Northern Lights Trilogy this week, and loving it.  how could you not love a series focused around a woman captaining ships in the late 1800s?  it’s been the perfect brain candy this week.  and the added bonus – in addition to being well-researched and well-written, these books point you to God’s sovereignty and the depths of His love in distinctly non-contrived, non-cheesy ways.  it’s the kind of Christian fiction you could loan your friends who aren’t Christian without it being awkward.  score.

— 3 —

speaking of good books – one came in the mail yesterday that i cannot wait to start reading tonight.  it’s a collection of poetry by Henry Vaughan called A Great Ring of Pure and Endless Light, and i’ve been looking for this book for years.  Madeleine L’Engle introduced me to Vaughan’s poetry in her fabulous book A Ring Of Endless Light, which i first read when i was 12 (and have re-read more times than i can count), and i’m so glad to have finally found this volume of poetry.

— 4 —

i’ve been thinking a lot this week about things that contribute to healthy relationships, mostly because i’ve just read so many great posts that have gotten me thinking about them.  here are three:

photo courtesy of © Depositphotos.com / andresr

• I’m Letting My Wife Go – it’s not what you think
• The Cost – there are some prices we shouldn’t pay
• Why It’s Hard To Be A Christian Online – or anywhere else

here’s what they left me thinking: what if we could put the concept of “letting go” to work in all of our relationships?  what if we could not only accept our differences but encourage each other in them?  what if we (gasp) chose to be okay with someone’s theology being what we would term “wrong”, and built bridges?  what if we could even argue heatedly about theology with the underlying foundation of “i still like you as a person, and will love you whether you ever change your mind about this or not”?

phrased like that, it seems so obvious – but in the day to day, face-to-face stuff, it can be tough to live out.  i want to get better at it, tho.

— 5 —

there’s a new parody video going around about modesty called “Virtue Makes You Beautiful.”  it’s clever and fun, and has a great message to girls everywhere (as most of its cheerleaders point out): “women, you’re beautiful, and integrity is so important.”  yes and amen.  i have to say tho, that i am so glad for the few kind voices who said “yes, but…” in the comments under this video.

i know i’m not the first person to say this, but one of the places healthier relationships between men and women in the church can start is for us to stop buying into the lies behind the modesty conversation.  no one is responsible for your sin but you.  men don’t need women to dress modestly in order to keep them from sinning.  women don’t need to cover up and wear shapeless clothing to protect men.  one of the side-effects of the modesty culture is that women are ashamed of being women.  it’s heartbreaking.  (more thoughts on this here, in takes 2 & 3.)

— 6 —

sometimes the most ridiculous things make me laugh.  this totally cracked me up:

— 7 —

There are 193 days until Island of Legends (Book 4 of The Unwanteds Series) comes out.  (It’s less than 200, so I feel it’s realistic to start counting now.)  🙂

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!